Tuesday, March 27, 2012

My dad

There is a moment when you read someone else’s blog about their dad passing away and you realise how lucky you are to still have your parents. Then you realise, as the tears start to fall, how it hits too close to home.

My dad has always been so strong. He had never broken a bone and had only had one major surgery.

Then a few years ago he had a major bowel bleed and was rushed to hospital. By the time I got there he was doing okay. I left and returned later to find him in ICU. He was so frail and there were so many wires. I actually stepped backwards away from the bed in shock. I just wanted to run away. This was not my dad; this strong, proud man. I clearly remember how I felt but most of all I remember Mark stepping in behind me to lend me his support and love. I will never forget that moment as long as I live. I love you honey.

Since the bowel surgery he has had numerous operations to remove melanomas from his face. He also fell and hit his head. He had a hernia operation and I remember him calling me in tears about the aftermath. Throughout the whole time he has managed to maintain his sense of humour. Even as I recall some of the things he has said to the doctors and nurses I am grinning.

He now needs a hip replacement. Even though we knew this would be hard going for him (he’s nearly 84) life just threw us a massive curve ball. His heart is failing. He needs heart surgery before he can have his hip replaced.

I know that we are all getting older and our bodies start to need repair; but seriously I definitely was not ready for that.

So now we wait. We wait for a letter to arrive to tell him when he can see the specialist. What I hate is that I have no control and I cannot help.

My advice is to spend the time with your family and friends NOW because you do not know what is around the corner. I do not want to waste one more day on things that can wait until I have phoned my parents, talked to my sisters, caught up with a friend or cuddled my nephews and nieces. I want to be present in their lives.

I actually think that Belinda has summed it up perfectly in her blog.

Life is short. I love you mum and dad.


  1. Oh honey, I'm so sorry to hear about this. I hope he gets a surgery date soon and all goes well. We need a reminder sometimes to cherish the ones we love. Thanks for giving me one today. Hugs.

    1. Thanks Kerry. I am sure he will get his surgery date soon. It's a scary reminder that life is just too short.

  2. I hope your dad is doing OK. It's hard to see our parents or beloved grandparents become more frail or vulnerable as they get older. We're so used to seeing them as superwoman or superman in our eyes - so strong and "big" and always there for us.
    It is so important to show those you love that you appreciate and love them every single day.

    1. Thanks Kez. I naively thought that my parents would always be around....obviously that's a dream. So they're here now and that's what really counts. xx