Friday, July 22, 2011

Circle of Trust

Friendship is an interesting thing.

When I was at school I had a huge circle of good friends. These were the people that I thought I would always be friends with no matter what. So almost 18 years after I left high school I find it a little ironic that from this group of friends I am still friends with just two people. I drifted away from many of these people when I was at University and those friendships dissolved. A few years ago I caught up with a school friend and I found it ironic that she is still friends with all the people I no longer see, and she is not friends with the two people that I still consider as close friends.

What I realise is that as you move through life you and others change; like the ebb and flow of the tides. There are people that are in your life for a long time and those that touch your life briefly. I believe that people come into your life to help you and teach you things as you come into theirs to do the same. I am not perfect. I have lost friends over the years through my own stupidity and/or thoughtlessness. I have also let friendships go for my own self-preservation.

As the eve of my 36th birthday approaches I look around and realise that I have the most amazing group of friends. Many are friends that I have had in my life for well over 15-20 years and are my ‘circle of trust’. They are the people that I go to when I need their wisdom and advice. Ultimately they are the people that I trust with my heart and my soul. However, I am a strong believer that it is not always the length of time that you have known someone, but the depth of feeling that you have for them that makes you love and trust them.  I have some very close friends that I have known for a short time that I trust implicitly.

I trust easily and yes I have been burnt in the past few years. I am re-learning to trust my own instinct when meeting new people. As I get older I realise that sometimes you need to guard yourself a little and not reveal everything all at once. One of the best things about friendship is getting to know the person bit-by-bit; a little like opening a present. Every layer is a surprise.

So I will treasure the friendships that I have and nurture them every single day.


  1. I am so lucky because I have good friends from both primary and high school. There were some people I thought I would always be close to but we drifted away from each other. I don't feel sad when that happens because we don't have to be lifelong friends with everyone. Like you, I believe that some people are forever friends and some are in our lives for a time so we can learn something about ourselves.
    I'm in a good place right now, friendship wise and it's really been a blessing. I am learning how to be vulnerable and that it's OK to not be perfect or to need moral support sometimes. I just hope I can be as good a friend as my friends have been to me.

  2. Yes, I have some incredible friends and they are so good to bounce ideas off. I have a horrid habit of being passive aggressive so sometimes they tell me to pull my head in which is fabulous :)