Monday, October 26, 2009

11. Camping + broken friendships

I can quite honestly say that camping is not for me. For the record, backpacking does not float my boat either. My sister works for a huge, international hotel chain so we have all stayed in some absolutely stunning hotels all around the world.

I love hotels. I love the fact that I have a nice bed, clean sheets, hot water and room service. When you are camping, I dislike the fact that hot water can be intermittent and I get a bit sick of cooking on a BBQ. I also HATE not having a washing machine!

I have had two memorable camping experiences; one good and one bad.

The first was when my friends and I went camping on a private property out in Muriwai at the end of High School. There were over 18 of us and we had an absolutely brilliant time. We had a very private camping site, a beautiful waterfall and had an amazing time and great New Year’s party. Even though I am no longer friends with most of these people, thinking back about this holiday makes me smile. It was also our transition from High School to University.

The second experience of camping I remember is because it was horrible at the end, and the fall out was emotionally draining. We went camping with a friend’s daughter and her family the same year of the Boxing Day Tsunami.

We were very excited about it and probably the one big mistake we made (in hindsight) was being on the same camping site. If we had been on the next site over things probably would have been fine.

In retrospect I probably felt a bit uncomfortable about my weight; nothing new there. Also, when I go on holiday I love nothing better than curling up with a book; which I expect can be seen as unsociable. Do not get me wrong, I did interact with everyone, but sometimes I just like time on my own. Also, we were camping with a lot of children and as we do not have children often it was hard for Mark and me to relate to some things.

It was when another friend of the people that we were camping with turned up; things turned a bit nasty and this new woman and I got a bit bitchy with each other. Even now I cannot stand her. Admittedly perhaps I was being a bitch and unsociable, but in all situations both sides need to take responsibility for their actions. In the end it was really “three’s a crowd”.

After having to hold our tent up and sleeping under the tarpaulin when the worst of the weather hit us and a huge “grrrr” moment with this girl we decided to leave early.

I did not really think a lot of it until a few weeks later when I was talking to my friend (whose daughter we went away with) and that is when things really got nasty. We were talking and I was explaining that I was a little bewildered about how things ended up. To which she replied “it was because I was hard to be around when we were camping and that her daughter did not know what was wrong with me”. What the hell?? I said “nothing was wrong with me and that it was not until XX turned up that things got a bit weird”. Then we got into a huge conversation about how I had been odd and that this friend had only been sticking up for her daughter (or something like that). Anyway I said “well I do not like XX anyway” and then it just got nasty. I then got told that “XX was a lovely person and a close friend of the family”.

Mark and I went from seeing my friend just about every day to not seeing them for over 2 years. It wasn’t until her eldest daughter actually text me out of the blue that I re-formed a relationship with members of this family. I have an amazing relationship with the daughter of my “old” friend and consider her one of my closest and most loved friends.

Looking back I realise that if the roles had been reversed, any one of my friends would have stuck up for me if they felt a person was being rude or unreasonable. However, I think that they would have addressed it at the time, rather than after the fact. The irony is that the person that we went camping holds no ill feelings years later. I still do not like or trust her friend, but then she is not my friend so does it matter?? Also, it is probably time to let it go and give camping one last try!

No comments:

Post a Comment